Solution

All right. I have turned the problem of not having a circle of writers or a writers group over and over in my mind.  During my walkies on Saturday (because, yes, I have to walk myself.  No one else will do it.), I had this stroke of genius strike me as I strolled passed newly shorn trees (I am still bitter about the lovely, terribly old birch trees the condo associated decided to sacrifice on the altar of the manager's boyfriend).  I could buy two or three volleyballs and paint faces on them.  They could be my writers group.

I have enough voices in my head.  It just might work.  What do you think, web spiders that browse my site?  My Also... post has received the most views to date.  Eleven.  I'm on my way now.

Also....

I was excited to see that eleven bots buzzed my blog on April 29th.

So, this is the thing........

I have read many, many books on writing. I have read countless websites on writing. I have gone to writing groups and writing classes, both collegiate and iconoclastic.  While I doubt not the volume of knowledge and understanding I have yet to learn, I can feel my feet under firm earth.  I know how to walk and talk.  My wings are strong.  I can leave the nest.

Yet, I stand on the edge and flap.  One piece of repeated advice I cannot seem to master:  writers group.  I cannot seemingly keep up a relationship with a writer.  And because I cannot stand outside myself and judge my performance, I have no idea why.

One writer, whom I invested time in listening to his process and perception, yelled at me for unbidden support. How dare I cheer his progress?

I've had relationships with writers.  One was close.  I cherished it, until one day the "constructive" criticism came in the form of an unfounded insight.  Now, I will say, the insight struck me from out of the blue like lightening.  It hurt. A lot.  I took a year off from writing to attempt to correct my fallacy, which wasn't a waste because, in the long run, it made me a better writing.

However, what's that old sitcom adage?  If everyone has a problem with you, then the problem is you.

I know it's me.  It has to be me.  If I could only see the plank in my eye to pull it out.

Dear Odin Above, I love Felicia. Her advice is solid.